Wisdom Teeth

For the past few months Stacy has been complaining how her teeth have been hurting and that she thinks that her wisdom teeth are coming through. Well, a couple of weeks ago the teeth broke the through the gums and Stacy has been able to chew through leafy green foods like a cow eats grass. Her extra set of chompers have come in handy, but they say that you are supposed to get them out at some point in your youth. I don’t really know who ‘they’ are, but ‘they’ are making a lot of money. I don’t think that Charles Darwin would be happy to find out that we are taking everyone’s wisdom teeth out. Nature has selected us to have wisdom teeth and we should probably keep them. It is our sense of human nature that has sustained us as a people for the past 5 thousand years (7 thousand years – even better).

Anyway, they took them out and they must have not been that bad, because the oral surgeon was in there for about 10 minutes yanking them out (so lets see, 1400 dollars for maybe a total of 20 minutes of work, that equals 4200 bucks an hour, I would like to see a lawyer bill that much an hour). She was loopy for the first day and pretty out of it. After sleeping until 10 o’clock the next morning she woke up to a swollen left cheek, she came to call herself, Quasimodo, aka the hunch back of Notre Dame (because of the lopsidedness of his face). I will let you be the judge. But she is doing much better, the pain is subsiding, and the swelling is going down. She can’t wait to start eating normal foods again; her diet has consisted of instant potatoes, pudding, jello, and ice cream. Before the surgery she was pretty excited to be on this diet for a whole week, but at this point I don’t think that she could eat another spoonful of Idahoan instant spuds.

Que hora es?

For those of you who know a little more Spanish than "hay muchos tacos en Mexico,""Una cerveza para mi," and "Feliz Navidad," you may actually understand what actually transpired in an interview between me and Gloria Carmona in the highly viewed Enlace Seminal. Now whether or not I made any sense in a topic of my expertise of la obesidad infantil is a whole other story (of which according to an earlier post by brad that stated that I occasionally poked fun of the husky pants that he wore as a youth). Some of you might recognize my shirt from my I.D. card from my junior year of high school, it was purchased between my sophomore and junior year and I think that it was my first Nautica shirt; I have not thrown it away because it still fits me. It is my golden boy.

For some background of how I ended up on this show, I was at work one day and my boss inquired whether or not I would help with a small interview in Spanish. I said yes and didn’t think much of it. Well, a few weeks, I found out that I would being go up to Salt Lake City to do the interview during the day, which of course I was on the clock for. The interview was supposed to be about childhood obesity. I asked the lady from the hospital that was in charge of putting this all together whether or not there were questions that I could review before going up there. I was told that they did not have any. Well, when I showed up to their little studio I received the list of questions that were supposedly sent to the lady at the hospital. So I quickly whipped up a few answers and translated them into Spanish in my head. It was kind of an awkward interview because I had to look into a camera lens, there were hot, bright lights all around me, and Gloria was in L.A. speaking to me on the phone. Needless to say it’s hard enough to understand the Hispanics in person, let alone on a poorly connected land line. Well, I have a few different videos that should include most everything that I said. The last question was really bad, I forgot what I was going to say and I look like a fool. But it is funny.

Nine on Nine, also known as Matt on Nine

This spring, because of a few miscommunications, Matt and his friends didn't get a 9 on 9 team for flag football. So...Matt decided to join our ward's 9 on 9 team. Turns out, Matt is the team. These poor boys don't know what hit them. A few of them know how to play, but some are a bit more interesting than others. Yesterday was the first game I went to, so I was able to take some visual evidence of what was going on.

Here's the pick of the game...watch Matt in the red shirt and silver shorts.

Here's Matt and some of the other players.

Matt has been playing basketball with his friends, though.

Monte Cristo, Student Projects, and What the Heck is That?

My students have recently finished reading The Count of Monte Cristo. It is an excellent book that happens to be a kajilion times better than the movie. I had my students do a variety of projects on the book, and I wanted to share them with you.

Some of the kids payed extra attention to landscape detail...

Some took hours making quilts with quotes from each character in a block...



And then some handed me these. Upon recieving such a project, I asked myslef, "What the heck is this." The student tells me that it's the scene where Caderousse kills his wife and the jewler. "Hmm." I say. I didn't know Caderousse was a little Army man. Can you say F?

Still not quite sure what this one is.

Insight into Matt's life

When I posted that I only got one random thing about Matt, Brad, Matt's brother, left a comment of a few other things about Matt that only a brother would know. So Brad, if you don't mind, I'm putting them on as a post. Needless to say, they are hillarious. Brad is an excellent writer, so enjoy...

Here's a few ideas, from Brad:

1. Matt once ate so much blue cotton candy at a carnival that he barfed blue that night. Matt slept on the top bunk and I slept on the bottom, and I awoke to a moan and then to a waterfall of blue vomit cascading down from the ceiling. We all warned him to not eat so much cotton candy that day. It must have been free; Matt wouldn't have paid for that much cotton candy.

2. Matt is the only person in our family to hit a homerun in little league baseball. I can't even fathom hitting a homerun, I was so afraid to even stand in the batter's box. I thought every ball was coming at my head. I was so proud when he hit that homerun, I told people at school the next day. No one was too impressed. For other people, hitting a homerun is not that uncommon. For me to have a brother hit a homerun was a source of great pride. I thought Matt was the next Jose Canseco. Thank goodness he wasn't.

3. Matt plays basketball like Ron Artest. Their games are identical; their tempers are not.

4. Matt likes kids, but not in a creepy way. He has the affection of most if not all of his little cousins and nieces. Whenever Jane picks up a phone and pretends to talk to someone, she says she is talking to "Uncle Matt." He will be an excellent pediatrician if that is the path he chooses.

5. Matt is the only person I have ever punched. In the face. Because I was mad. I have never been in a real fight (still waiting for the right moment), and punching Matt is the closest I've ever come. We're lying in bed one night, this time I'm on the top bunk and he's down below, when Matt decides to make some jokes about how I wore "husky" pants at the time and preferred to keep my shirt on when swimming. This was a sensitive issue with me, one about which I shed some tears. I first asked him nicely to stop. He refused. Then I threatened him. He continued to mock me. I had no choice but to swing down from the top bunk, not unlike a gorilla, and punch him in the face. I guess my message was not clear enough, nor my punch strong enough: he laughed hysterically and uncontrollably before, during, and after the punch. I should have just sat on him instead.

6. Matt learned to not cry wolf the hard way at home one Sunday afternoon during "quiet time." I had pinned him several times and he had escaped by telling me he had to go to the bathroom. Finally I decided not to give in to his excuse, so I didn't let him up when he said he had to pee. Wouldn't you know, he peed his pants. He went running upstairs to tell our parents, but somehow I talked him into staying in the basement. You could always persuade Matt not to tell on you. I think he knew that if he got me in trouble, his fun would be over.

7. Matt bought Mandy's wedding ring. Well, he loaned me money to buy it. I had no money, and Matt always seemed to have a lot, perhaps because of his cheapness (he's not cheap, just "careful with money"). So he provided me with an interest free loan that allowed me to buy Mandy a ring. I worked all summer pulling weeds at the Bermuda Triangle alongside Matt at the Sandy Parks Dept. and paid him back on the morning he left for Chile.

8. Matt had the most unbelievable 12th birthday in the history of American boys. The milestone birthdays (5, 8, 12, 16) tended to be more fruitful in the Serafine home, but Matt's 12th is legendary. There is a picture out there, a classic, of Matt standing outside beaming while surrounded by his bountiful mountain of gifts. You can hardly even see Matt because of all the gifts. These are just the gifts I remember him receiving that day: a folding lawn chair, a boy scout shirt, a mountain bike, RBI Baseball for the original Nintendo, a supersoaker, a hiking backpack, and probably a 2-liter bottle of Cherry 7-Up and a king-size Twix bar that he ate at a glacial pace by licking and nibbling the chocolate off the caramel and nougat, then eating the caramel, and finally the nougat. This was an unprecedented birthday windfall. My parents have no explanation for this other than, "we got some good deals." Something more was at play that year, and I would really like to know the truth behind Matt's 12th birthday.

Not quite 25 random things about Matt

When I told Matt that he needed to come up with 25 random things about himself, he came up with one.

1. He had fleas the whole time he was in Chile.

Well, if he thinks of any more, I'll let you know.

25 Random Things About Stacy

So, a few other people have done this on their blog, and I thought you might enjoy some random things about me, some of which have pictures!

Coming soon: 25 random things about Matt.

25. I'm allergic to strawberries, kiwis, and penicillin.

24. I teach at Lehi High school, the shooting location for Footloose. See the school in the far left background? That's Lehi! Kevin Bacon had no idea how great this place was when he was shoveling wheat at Lehi Roller Mills. (I paused the movie and took a picture of our TV)

23. I'm trailer trash. This is the door to my classroom, and the inside of my classroom.

22. Whenever my kids ask for gum, I tell them go pull some off the bottom of their desk. So far no one has.

21. The furthest I've ever been away from home is Ensenada, Mexico. I don't recommend it.

20. I took years of private tap dance lessons.

19. I used to pray about meeting Michael Flately, the lord of the dance. (I've since come to my senses and only pray for things I know I should pray for.)

18. I used to live in Riverton, Wyoming. I loved it and became a true cowgirl. I had the boots, the denim dress, the Wranglers, and listened to country music. (I still like it--it brings back memories.)

17. I once caught a 19-inch cutthroat trout. Unfortunately, our camper fridge went out on our way home and the fish spoiled. I even caught it with my grandma's Ugly Stick.

16. I suck at my timestables. Don't even try to ask me what 9 times 7 is. I honestly don't know. I'd have to take a few minutes and count.

15. I'm uber organized. I'll organize and re-organize everything.

14. I didn't understand football until I married Matt. I used to go to the games and occasionally cheer for the wrong team because I wasn't paying attention. When we were dating, Matt wanted to watch a whole football game with me, which I had never done before. During the game I was feeling really bad that I would have rather been at my apartment with my roommates. I thought maybe it was a sign that I didn't like him. It wasn't--I was just really bored.

13. I'm addicted to chapstick, specifically cherry Carmex. I can't be without it or I panic.

12. I pity all you people who don't know what a real potato is. Go see my Grandpa McKenzie and he'll give you a real potato that's bigger than your face.

11. I love the story Little Black Sambo. My Grandma McKenzie used to tell it to me when I was little--I've never forgotten it.

10. I once learned the term "old bag" from my aunts Jane, Kristina, and Mandy. One day I was with my Grandma Shick and called someone an "old bag." My grandma nearly fainted because of my insult.

9. I played with dolls until I was in 5th grade. I loved them. I especially loved collecting real baby things and using them on my dolls. I used to steal my sister's diapers and use them on my babies. My mom didn't like that much.

8. Tomatoes are poisonous. If I eat them I'll die of grossness. I do like salsa and ketchup, though.

7. I can't sleep if the closet doors or dresser drawers are open. I'm afraid a monster might jump out or something. My mom is the same way.

6. I hate British Lit. Excuse me while I die of boredom. I love American Lit, especially where people's American dreams are shattered.

5. I don't have a favorite anything. I'm that indecisive.

4. I once got sent to the Principal's office once for repeatedly dropping my CTR ring on my desk. It was loud and my teacher got mad. I was mortified and felt like I'd die. I didn't tell my mom for a long time, and when I did, I bawled. I guess I didn't choose the right. Oops.

3. I have an obsession with kitchen gadgets. I hoard them. I also have an intense knowledge of all things housewares. I used to work at Bed, Bath and Beyond and learned way too much.

2. I totalled 2 cars in a matter of 3 months, making my car crashing total 4--all of which were my fault. Car insurance was a killer after that. (Don't worry, I'm a much safer driver now. It's been 3 years with no accidents! Go me!)

1. I can wiggle my ears.

I now tag everyone who reads this. I'm interested to see the random things about you!

Meet the Birdie Sling

On Valentines day, Matt and I went up to West Jordan to help Matt's parents put insulation in the garage of their new house. Afterward, we went up to Gardner Village and looked around. There is this really fun fabric store that has lots of cute fabric and patterns. I found a pattern for a bag, and ta-da! Here it is!

It looks a little lop-sided here, but it really isn't. It was slouching for its photo shoot.

I think my favorite thing about it is that it has one very wide handle.

But I also like that it's very big. Now my bag collection is getting a little out of hand. You can never have too many though, right? That's what I keep telling Matt, but he doesn't buy it. : )